


The Only Hope For Me Is You

by TenSpencerRiedPlease



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Alpha Bucky Barnes, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, BAMF Natasha Romanov, BAMF Tony Stark, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Recovering, D/s elements, M/M, Natasha Romanov Has Issues, Natasha Romanov Is Not A Robot, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Natasha is actually kind of a manipulative bro, Omega Tony Stark, Rating May Change, Tony Feels, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, but still she's doing her best
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2020-12-08 23:51:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20985341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TenSpencerRiedPlease/pseuds/TenSpencerRiedPlease
Summary: Bucky sits with his head in his hands because he knows this is going to be a disaster. There’s… fuck sakes there’s so much he doesn’t even know where to start on explanations and if he’s going to do this his omega needs explanations. Like a lot of them. Not that he wanted an omega to begin with and this is absurd, just fucking bat shit crazy that this is arealsentence offered up by actual court of officials who genuinely think this is a proper solution to this case.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Lol yes this IS named after a My Chemical Romance song because I'm a trash can who can't name stuff. Granted, the song fits and so does the title so.
> 
> Anyway, this is a new thing and I hope y'all like it. It does involve a BUNCH of Natasha stuff in it too, she's got her own recovery arc in this on account of she's fucked up too. The potential is also on the table for Tony/Bucky/Natasha but I don't know how I do or don't want this to develop on account of I usually let the character and plot needs tell me where I should go, but that's a possibility. I'll change the tags if needed. Also, there will be some D/s elements to the story too, which again I will drop authors notes as needed.
> 
> Warning for some implied abuse/ domestic violence in this- nothing too explicit but its mentioned.

Bucky sits with his head in his hands because he knows this is going to be a disaster. There’s… fuck _sakes _there’s so much he doesn’t even know where to start on explanations and if he’s going to do this his omega _needs _explanations. Like a _lot _of them. Not that he wanted an omega to begin with and this is absurd, just fucking bat shit crazy that this is a _real _sentence offered up by actual court of officials who genuinely think this is a proper solution to this case. He has no idea how or why anyone would think _marriage _is somehow going to solve his problems or even how that would work in a practical situation.

He senses more than sees or hears Steve sit next to him and he hears Steve sigh. “Bucky, I know this isn’t what you wanted but it’s the best case scenario,” he murmurs and they both know that’s bullshit.

“Steve, I have to basically pick a mail order omega out of a damn _binder _because I got court ordered to bond with one. I’m _already _bonded with one what the fuck do they think this’ll do?” he asks. Not that anyone considers his bond with Natasha much of one. Apparently it doesn’t count if its platonic in nature, familial even, which Bucky thinks is a fucking copout.

Steve sighs, “Bucky we both know they think it’ll make you less violent,” he says and Bucky rolls his eyes.

“Well no one read the numbers like I did. Most of those omegas end up dead or abused but sure, that’ll fucking work,” he snaps. He’d read on the subject in case he got stuck in this situation and he’s not violent, not naturally anyway, but he’d still been subject to charges over his crimes as the Winter Soldier. And this _joke _of a solution is what he’d been handed and he had a sneaking suspicion this is what he’d get. But if he were truly violent this is mostly a death sentence to the omegas who get stuck in these marriages and how the _hell _no one thought that maybe this is a bad policy choice he’s got no clue. But he’s not the one who makes sentencing laws or whatever the fuck led to this garbage.

“You wouldn’t do either of those things, Bucky,” Steve says softly like he has no idea what kind of fucked up shit he did as the Winter Soldier. And there’s no shortage of fucked up shit, he literally killed two presidents and that’s on the less messed up end of things. Not that anyone knows about the second one and he wasn’t about to say anything about it either. But JFK kind of became iconic so he couldn’t avoid that one.

He lets out a long sigh. “Does that really matter?” he asks. Because the omega he gets stuck with probably won’t care, he’s sure they’ll know this is usually a death sentence for them and its not like they can leave. They’re basically trapped in a reform marriage by law even though they’ve been pretty thoroughly proven to _not work_.

“Oh course it does!” Steve says, almost sounding offended and Bucky knows he’s pleased with this result. He doesn’t want to see Bucky suffer for crimes he had little control in committing given the circumstances but Bucky would rather see jail time than trap someone with him for the rest of their life. Bad enough that’s kind of what he did with Natasha. Not purposefully obviously, that’d been by design and neither of them had a choice in it but they did grow fond of each other. Or more like Natasha grew fond of him and she didn’t get stuck on ice. It helped, the cryo coupled with the electroshock, to wipe his memory but Natasha only got half of those things. Eventually the torture stopped working and she busted them both out, leaving a pretty bloody trail in her wake.

Frankly Bucky thinks its HYDRA and the Red Room’s fault for that. They took everything from Natasha but them, and they told her in no uncertain terms that she was to have zero connections to anyone. Bucky was a fluke, but their big mistake was contradicting themselves when they claimed she couldn’t have any connections but to remain loyal to them. Natasha is smart, she figured out that connections weren’t the problem HYDRA or the Red Room had, it was connections to people who weren’t _them _that they took issue with. And they had mistakenly assumed that Bucky counted as them. Stupid, considering he’d get snatches of memory if he was out too long and he never did follow protocol exactly. Something the defense used in their case against him and boy had Steve been impressed about that.

He’d fought hard, arguing that wasn’t _really _Bucky except it was. Sure it felt more like he was locked in his own head, watching someone else’s actions take place but it was him nonetheless. Which he out and out stated on the stand while Steve looked on in horror because this, the result that he got, was the sentence Steve was hoping for. And Bucky can’t help but bitterly think he’s selfish for it, for preferring to see someone else trapped in the prison of a marriage they don’t want than to see Bucky in jail or worse. He’s fine with paying for his crimes, he committed them. But that fucking set of videos Steve found of him being tortured swayed the jury hard. All of them were crying, even that big ass burly guy that quite looked like he wanted to fry Bucky’s ass for JFK in particular. Probably why he got a sympathy sentence.

“No it fucking _doesn’t_, Steve,” he says, shaking him off and walking away. He’s got twenty four hours to find someone and Bucky’s tempted, despite all Steve’s hard work, to fuck this over purposefully so at least someone in this situation gets to go free. He’s been in prison for _far_more of his life than not and he might hear horror stories about the American prison system but he doubts its worse than HYDRA.

*

Steve looks panicked and Natasha already knows how this entire argument is going to go so she holds up her hand to cut to the chase. “I’ll talk him into it,” she says and Steve’s relief isn’t just palpable, he flat out falls straight onto a bench when the tension is released from his body. She doesn’t like him at all but she does care about Bucky, when she feels like it, and she refuses to see him in jail for crimes he never would have committed on his own. Guilt be damned she knows better than most what was done to him. Its not lost on her that she had gotten away with her crimes either, and her trial was short lived. Its also not at _all _lost on her that the first judge she’d gotten would have given her jail time but the second had been lenient.

She’s done her research, omegas are better judges and they hand out more fair sentences across the board. Alphas favor omegas, thinking them weak and fragile. She knows that first judge, the omega, knew full well that she was capable of committing the crimes she was on trial for and that she’s culpable for her actions. The second saw a thin, conventionally attractive omega and felt bad for her. Bucky doesn’t get that kind of luck though, and of the three different judges he went through none of them seemed content to take it easy on him. But alphas are seen as violent by nature and that’s either used to excuse their crimes or to throw the book at them, usually depends on ethnicity.

Or in Bucky’s case how many iconic presidents you killed.

That video footage was a stroke of genius on Steve’s behalf, it bought Bucky more than enough sorry points to get him the lightest sentence he could have gotten but she knows how Bucky feels. Prison isn’t new to him and he’s fine with staying locked up forever. Might even prefer it, given the amount of guilt he feels. It’s almost funny, she thinks, that she got off scot-free when she doesn’t much feel guilty for anything she’s done. HYDRA and the Red Room sent her after scum, she doesn’t care that she killed those people and as far as she’s concerned it was a public service.

And all the people she killed busting her way out of HYDRA and the Red Room? They earned their fate and then some. Given the choice she wouldn’t change a thing but its Bucky, thanks to assumptions about their natures, that gets viewed as the monster when only one of them became everything their training taught them to be.

Natasha doesn’t feel bad about her monstrous nature either, why should she? She was forced to become a monster by someone else and she refuses to apologize for the actions of other people. And she refuses to apologize for what her nature settled into. She’s fine with who she is, _how_she is. Maybe she’ll never develop a genuine connection to more than one person but she doesn’t see how that’s a bad thing really. Its not like she’ll ever meet anyone who’s been through a situation like hers so Bucky is it anyway. Ideally she wouldn’t even have that but her therapist tells her human connections are necessary to good mental health.

Natasha thinks her therapist is a quack but she holds back on her personal assessment of why he went into therapy to begin with. He’s had a sad life, she figures she’ll spare him bringing up that time he watched his best friend die falling from the sky and sought to give other people therapy because he felt so out of control regarding his own emotions. She knows how it feels to reach out for something, anything, to grasp just a little control over her life. Its why she paints figurines, its why Steve tried so desperately to keep Bucky out of prison, and its why Bucky found himself unusual tastes in the bedroom. Everyone wants just a small grasp on their lives because truthfully no one can any amount of true control over their lives, not when so much of what happens to people is a wild card.

So she lets Sam have his stupid therapy sessions where he tells her to cherish her friends, not that she has any, because he lost his.

“Thank you,” Steve breathes out, relieved because he has no desire to lose his friend either. Not again anyway.

Natasha doesn’t bother with a response because she’s only got so much time to convince Bucky and it’ll take time. She’s prepared though so when she finds him with his eyes glazed over looking at a binder of pictures fully intending on not choosing anyone she sits across from him. “Meek, buys into too many stereotypes of omegas, likes the color yellow too much to be normal,” she says, flicking the page over. Bucky startles because he’s sloppy and not paying attention to his surroundings. Natasha has no idea how he can do that. She doesn’t even let her guard down when she sleeps.

Bucky looks down at the new picture and flips it over himself. She figured he would, the overly Christian guy on the page wouldn’t exactly blend well with Bucky’s Jewish roots not that he practices much anymore. Seventy years of violent torture puts a person out of practice and Natasha wonders if he has any real belief anymore. Even so she figured he wouldn’t have gone for an immediate clash in character even if differing religions isn’t the worst difference a couple could have. But he flips the page nonetheless.

“Irritating, laughs like a demented hyena, smells like onions,” she says, turning the page. She has to live with this person too; she’s not allowing Bucky to pick someone awful. Which is what she tells him when he looks at her funny.

“I don’t even _want _to do this,” he says, pushing the binder away from himself.

She pushes it back to him. “You’re doing this,” she tells him and he lets out an annoyed sigh.

“Not if I can help it,” he mumbles.

“You’re _doing _this,” Natasha repeats with more force this time, “because I did not drag your ass out of hell for you to just _leave _me.”

It’s profoundly selfish to ask and Bucky isn’t stupid. She doesn’t need him, she doesn’t need anyone, but the only way to get Bucky to take care of himself is to act like not doing that will hurt someone he cares about. And apparently Steve doesn’t count. She suspects that’s because Bucky finds his actions selfish, which they are, but unlike her selfishness it isn’t coming from a place of understanding. Steve wants his friend back and that’s sympathetic, but Natasha knows what Bucky has been through, she’s been through most of it herself. Their grief is different and Bucky has more sympathy for the person more like him.

Too bad she’s on Steve’s side here.

“Well since you know so much about these people which one do you recommend? And how’d you find out anything about them at all?” he asks.

She rolls her eyes, “you know better than that, Bucky. I followed them around, obviously. Here,” she says, flipping the pages until she gets to who she wants. “Head strong, incredibly intelligent, bit arrogant about it, and absolutely will not roll over for anyone unless he wants to. You want someone who will tell you in no uncertain terms how they feel regardless of how much or little it’ll hurt your feelings? He’s it,” she says, gesturing to the picture of one Tony Stark.

She doesn’t mention the long history of abuse, extreme trust issues, probable bipolar disorder, and the fact that Tony will more than likely take _years_to adjust. Bucky is the one who’s a glutton for punishment and Stark will absolutely give him that and then some. But when he does learn to trust, and she knows he will, he’s shockingly generous and loving and fiercely loyal. Bucky will need to earn it but by the time he does he will have felt like he’s genuinely earned that level of attachment. It’s the best of both worlds- Bucky will get that punishment he so thinks he deserves but it won’t be without a reward.

Bucky looks over the picture and she knows he’s drawn to it. It’s the only picture in the binder where the person in it is staring directly at the camera and it’s a medium close up shot. And Stark isn’t just passively watching the cameraperson, he’s outright staring them down. It does help that Tony is attractive, exceedingly so, and his eyes are exceptionally pretty. It’s the eyelashes, Natasha knows, and how they frame his brown eyes so thickly it almost looks like he’s wearing makeup. He’s not, she’s seen him in person enough times to know he isn’t. She’s almost jealous. Her eyelashes are this hideous light red shade that makes her want to rip them off. But then she’d look even more ridiculous so she tints them brown.

“He’s pretty,” Bucky says eventually.

Natasha rolls her eyes, “astute observation, Barnes.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for some references to child abuse and domestic violence- nothing heavy or explicit but mentions are there.

Tony looks at his mother like she’s nuts. “Get the fuck out of here,” he says because he’s got nothing better, truly. Fuck, he’s got about two things going for him as an omega and one of those things is being too rich to end up married to some violent criminal that’s likely to kill him anyway because people are fucking _stupid _and don’t know how to read case studies. And its not even like it’s just a couple, it’s like eighty percent of all the case studies done on the subject. And every single exception showed that the person who committed the violent crime was either wrongfully convicted or there were extreme circumstances that pushed them into their initial violent crime.

So basically his shitty ass parents have sentenced him to death because apparently he’s _not _too rich to avoid that fate. So wow, okay, that’s fucking _garbage_.

He gets an exasperated look for his outburst and he honestly can’t believe she’s being so blasé about this. “Tony, don’t be dramatic,” she says like she’s not just sentenced him to Howard or _worse_.

“Dramatic? I’m not being _dramatic _I think I’m reacting the appropriate amount of horrified to find out I’m being married off to a violent criminal. What the _fuck_?” he asks, voice rising in pitch. Oh, he can feel the way his head is getting lighter too, and the tunnel vision, and his heart was already racing and he has no _time _for panic attacks right now he has shit to deal with.

“Tones? What is going on?” someone new asks and he turns to find Rhodey standing there and he forgot Rhodey was coming over. He immediately runs over and throws his arms around him because he has no idea what to do here because its not like he gets a _say_and he knew his parents were forcibly holding back on marrying him off just to make sure he suffers even more. “Hey, whoa what is going on?” Rhodey murmurs, rubbing his back.

“He’s getting married,” Maria tells him unceremoniously and Rhodey lets out a surprised squawk.

“To _who_?” he asks, probably out of shock than anything. Probably because, if anything, Rhodey likely assumed Tony would get married to _him_. Which, in his defense, was kind of the plan once Tony was done school anyway but _that_got shot in the face.

“Some fucking criminal, I don’t know!” Tony yells and he _sounds _hysterical and he doesn’t know when that happened but he’s having a difficult time catching his breath and _fuck _why him?

Rhodey’s arms tighten around him. “Are you fucking _kidding me_?” he asks. “What are you, stupid? Do not know how to read or do you just not care that most of the omegas in those types of arrangements end up dead or worse?” he asks. The disgust in his tone is palpable and it surprises Tony because he doesn’t ever really tell Tony’s parents how he feels about them. Which isn’t very positively. His mother has no such qualms but Rhodey usually keeps it to himself.

Maria lets out a harsh sigh. “I know who it is, and the circumstances are… exceptional to say the least. Tony won’t be hurt,” she says.

“Oh, like I’m supposed to trust your judgment on who will and won’t hurt Tony,” Rhodey mumbles darkly. “You’ve done a bang up job of _that_so far,” he adds and Tony’s so shocked his vision clears a little. He knows how Rhodey feels, knows his opinions don’t quite take into account the scope of their situation, but holy _shit _he just said that out loud.

“What exactly is that supposed to mean?” Maria asks and they all know. Its not like any of them are stupid, or at least not in regards to this situation.

And Rhodey, because apparently he’s not having it today, rolls his eyes. “You really expect me to believe after a lifetime of abuse from Howard that you didn’t seem to do anything about I’m supposed to trust _your _judgment on whether or not Tony will get hurt? Yeah, not happening.”

He _knew_he’d say something like that and its not like it’s an unfamiliar argument to them either. “You _know_it’s not that simple,” Tony tells him but to Rhodey it is. He’s never been abused, not like Tony anyway, so just leaving is about as complicated as Rhodey gets on the subject. But it’s hard to escape someone with a lot more money and resources than you especially after you’ve spent the last several decades being strategically cut off from everyone you know. There’s a certain point, and certain situations, where ‘just leave’ doesn’t capture the magnitude of the repercussions that could happen if you did that.

Which he supposes he’ll get more intimate knowledge of whenever the hell he’s married off to someone he _knows_has committed a violent crime, that’s how these things work. Insane is what it is but Tony’s not exactly unused to people acting like omegas can solve alpha’s personality disorders and various array of traumas. But god help an alpha if they have to deal with a traumatized omega, then they’re overemotional and too much work. He gets called high maintenance a lot, which he finds ridiculous because that’s basically code for ‘standards higher than ‘showers regularly’ and I don’t like it.’

“Fine, but not marrying you off to some violent criminal is Tony, what the fuck?” Rhodey asks, drawing him back to the situation at hand. Which, thanks, he hates that.

“I’ll give you that,” he mumbles.

“This is your ticket out Tony, and when you realize that I expect an apology,” Maria tells him and he can’t help the snort he lets out as she walks away. Rhodey, on the other hand, looks like he’s seeing red.

“Relax,” Tony murmurs, running his hands down Rhodey’s arms. “I won’t need to worry about it once I’m dead.” Predictably that does not result in Rhodey calming down.

*

Bucky’s jaw is clenched and he wants nothing to do with this but he’s not exactly sure he can back out now and he _knows_Natasha manipulated him into it. She doesn’t need him around, some days he’s sure she’d prefer if he wasn’t. So that line about dragging him out of hell isn’t really how she feels, it’s just that she must feel for Steve enough to act on his behalf. Or maybe she doesn’t, maybe she just doesn’t want to see him in jail and this is her way of making sure that doesn’t happen. All he knows for sure is that Natasha Romanov doesn’t need anyone and that includes him. It’s not really a surprise that she saved him, not the other way around.

So he considers maybe just leaving because Natasha will be fine without him, was fine without him most of the time anyway given that he spent most of their relationship in cryo. And frankly he spent the other half of it beating the hell out of her because she had to be trained. He’s a little horrified that she cares about him at all after all that. He’s a little horrified at himself for _putting_her through that. Not that either of them had a choice in the matter, not really.

Any plans he has to leave fall apart when Steve shows up because of course he does but the weary look on his face tells him something is up. “I don’t think you made the greatest choice in omega,” he says and Bucky rolls his eyes.

“Well I don’t think the courts made the greatest decision in sentencing so I guess we’re all going to be unhappy,” he snaps.

“Buck,” Steve says softly, “you didn’t deserve jail time.”

“Well I didn’t _want_marriage and I didn’t want a sympathy sentence either. If they wanted to do that an acquittal would do.” Or finding him not guilty or whatever the hell wasn’t an actual sentence these days. Its not like he’s up to snuff on the legal system, he found out about seat belts on a conscious level about three months ago. Back in his day if you got into a car accident you died. Now its weird what people can survive.

Steve sighs, “I think they were worried you might like… revert back to that state, the Winter Soldier state.”

He won’t, Natasha found the book of trigger words and burned it the first year they were on the run. Doesn’t work without the trigger words and anyone who had them memorized is dead. Natasha is good, she wouldn’t have left loose ends, Bucky trusts her on that. “Great, so some sorry omega gets to deal with it. Nice,” he mumbles. Tony Stark, according to the back of the picture. Looked like it’d been clipped from a magazine and he’s only human, they guy is pretty. Really pretty. And he trusts Natasha to know that he’s not some kind of pushover either.

“Yeah, pretty sure you’ll be the one suffering,” Steve mumbles under his breath, probably used to people not hearing him but Bucky’s hearing is as sensitive as Steve’s.

“What exactly makes you think that?” Bucky asks, irritated. He’s got a sneaking suspicion of Steve’s thought process but he’ll let Steve dig his own hole.

“I saw him earlier dramatically whining at his mother. Can’t say I’m surprised he’s Howard’s son,” he says.

Yeah, something went off in that relationship but Bucky hasn’t had time to ask. After talking to Howard for five minutes he felt no need to ask either, guy is a grade A prick but if Tony were like his father Natasha wouldn’t have recommended him so Steve’s wrong on that. “He’s being forced into marriage, I think he’s earned the right to whine,” Bucky tells him.

“You aren’t violent, Bucky,” Steve says almost forcefully.

“One, I doubt Tony knows that. Two, yes I am, Steve. You can’t ignore the amount of people I’ve killed forever just because you’ve justified it to yourself.” That’s convenient, being forgiven for all the things he’s done because it ‘wasn’t him.’ It _was_him and he’d been fine with acknowledging that until Steve threw himself into it.

Steve throws his hands up, “you were _tortured_, Bucky. No one can endure that without breaking eventually,” he says. “It’s not like you decided to pick up a job as an assassin out of the local news paper, that was forced on you.”

He’s spared telling Steve that a better person than him would have died instead of giving in because the door to the room opens. Tony walks in looking deeply unimpressed and he’s prettier in person than he is in pictures even looking as pissed off as he is. He looks Bucky over and crosses his arms, “great,” he mumbles.

Bucky has no idea what that means but he sees Steve tense beside him. “Can you like… go?” he asks because if Tony is giving _him _looks the look Steve gets is ten times worse. Impressive, considering Bucky is pretty sure he doesn’t actually know the guy. Or at least Steve doesn’t know him given how he reacted to Tony.

For a moment he’s pretty sure Steve isn’t going to go but he does, giving Tony one last suspicious look before he leaves the room. Bucky turns back to Tony but before he can say anything Tony talks.

“Yeah, so I think we can move past the honeymoon phase where you’re nice, maybe even _too_nice before you occasionally act like an ass, apologize profusely because they always do that even though it never lasts. And then the fighting gets worse, blah, blah, you hit me, I pretend like you won’t do it again because I’m _stuck _here, and you act like you’re really not going to do it but you do, then _that _gets worse too. So I think we can skip all that shit and get right to the part where you decide if you can’t have me no one can and kill me off so we can like. Get this over with because I don’t have _time _for all that,” he says in _far _too blasé a tone.

“I… don’t want to do any of that,” he says honestly, taken aback by Tony’s assessment.

To say Tony doesn’t look like he believes him is an understatement. “Uh huh, sure. So back to the not having time for this thing, I was serious about that,” he says, arms crossed.

“And I was serious about not wanting to hurt you. I didn’t even want this sentence, I wanted jail.” Natasha had told him to be honest and that’s true though it seems to throw Tony for a moment so he suspects her advice is good. She’s better at the spy portion of what their job was anyway and unlike most of her advice this isn’t straight manipulation. Honesty probably will win him more points than not and he figures Tony’s owed that much anyway. So he figures Natasha’s advice here is probably better than whatever he’d come up with. Bucky never needed to be good with people like Nat, he was mostly there to take out a target regardless of how many people died in the crossfire. His lack of skill shows now given that he’s got no idea how to handle Tony.

Tony looks him over like he can determine if Bucky’s lying if he stares at him hard enough. “Why the hell would you want that?” he asks.

“Well, I was guilty, first of all. Not that anyone seemed to take me outright _telling _them that into account,” he mumbles.

That seems to throw Tony for a loop too. “Great, fucking reassuring, thanks for that,” he says, taking a small step back.

Bucky sighs because this is going to be a long day and not just for him.

*

Realistically Tony knows if he wanted to disappear he could. Its not like he’d be unable to sell a few of his more expensive things, get enough cash to disappear, and make sure he never resurfaces. He’s got the tech skill to ensure no matter how many cameras catch him in their view no one will ever know. The problem though is that he has a life, accomplishments, things he doesn’t really want to leave behind. He could, of course, but he doesn’t want to. Not that he wants to be stuck with a guy who outright _admitted _he was guilty of whatever the hell he’d been charged with and frankly Tony is too afraid to ask. He almost prefers being in the dark because at least then he can pretend maybe whatever crime it was wasn’t that bad.

He might think there were some kind of circumstances but he’s not stupid, sympathy sentences don’t tend to get handed out to special cases and they’re almost always handed out to white alphas in particular. He did some extra reading after his mom threw this shit on him and expected him to be grateful. And it turns out Rhodey already knew all that not that Tony is entirely surprised.

Oh, and to make his shit day worse turns out Rhodey is being deployed tomorrow so there’s that to not look forward to. He’d been planning on telling him when he came over and instead the poor bastard walked into yet another Stark family shit storm. Now Tony gets to deal with _multiple _shitty things at once because its not like Rhodey can say _no_. Tony doesn’t even know why he joined the military anyway; he should have been a pilot or something. So he likes planes and flying, Tony’s sure he could have come up with something better than the damn Air Force.

So he’s stuck in a house with someone he knows is guilty of some kind of violent crime because his parents are pieces of shit. He expects this out of Howard but he didn’t see it coming from his mom and that hurts.

A soft knock sounds on the door of the room he’s retreated into with _zero_intentions of leaving so he ignores it. He has no strong desire to talk to his future husband, _ugh_, or anyone else for that matter. He’d noticed another pair of shoes coming into the house and given the size it’d been safe to say they weren’t Bucky’s. Because _that’s _the guy’s name, fucking _Bucky_. What in the cousin fucking _shit _is that?

He hears a soft sigh from the other side of the door before Bucky, presumably, knocks again. “I’m not Bucky,” the person says and Tony frowns. He considers leaving the person there for a few long moments before they sigh again on the other side. “What exactly do you have to lose by opening the door?”

Well, he’d say his life except his life as he knows it is already over so he doesn’t even have that now. He sighs and goes to the door, opening it to find a shockingly pretty redhead on the other side. “Who the hell are you?” he asks, confused.

“Natasha. And I’m something of an expert on Bucky so I figure I could be useful,” she tells him.

He looks her over. “Well, you’re at least alive so he’s not feeling murderous at the moment,” he mumbles. Assuming that’s what he’d been charged with to begin with. Tony doesn’t really want to consider the possibility of other violent crimes and he can’t believe _murder _is the least shit of those options.

Natasha’s lips tip up in some approximation of a smile that doesn’t look quite right. “Bucky doesn’t really feel murderous ever,” she tells him and he thinks that’s supposed to comfort him.

“I think that’s worse,” he mumbles, half turned away.

“He’s not… well, he’d never intentionally hurt anyone,” she says.

“Adorably reassuring. What do you want?” Presumably to make Bucky look less heinous but that’s not about to happen so Tony’s tempted to tell her to save her breath.

She looks him over like she’s trying to glean some type of information off him but he’s pretty sure she fails at it. “I’m hoping to make you more… comfortable,” she says, frowning a little as a somewhat constipated look crosses her face.

Tony laughs, “yeah, not going to happen but sure, thanks for the attempt,” he tells her before closing the door.

“Bucky is a genuinely good man,” she tells him through the door. “If you’d let him be.”

“Don’t think you _let _anyone be a good person, I think that’s just something you are or aren’t,” he tells her. He can hear her shuffle around at the door for a few moments but she eventually leaves and he goes back to sulking on his bed.

He’s laying there for some time before there’s another knock on the door. Tony is fully intending to ignore it but then Bucky speaks. “We’re supposed to get married tomorrow. Figured you might want to choose your witness,” he murmurs.

Tony glares at the door. “Send my mom,” he says. Might as well spare Rhodey watching this shit, he’d rather shoot himself in the dick than see Howard on any given day, and Pepper is currently across the country. Kind of only leaves his mom.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to work tomorrow so I figured I'd post this and at least wake up to a sprinkling of comments to start my day in not a garbage way lmao. Also my roommate got a new cat and thankfully she seems to be adjusting okay to my cat. Except my cat is an idiot bitch who has no idea how to cat so she's very confused on what to do here. Mostly she just stares on in confusion.
> 
> Warning for mentions of abuse and child abuse.

Yeah, so he’s had a shit week and usually he wouldn’t be pissed off at Rhodey for not telling him about is deployment, he gets why that’d be hard for him but now he’s gone and Tony is _married _so. Tony supposes he can count himself lucky enough that Bucky doesn’t seem to care much about him going to class because that’s the kind of thing he needs to consider now. Thankfully math comes easy to him so the fact that his morning was taken up by getting _married _isn’t that much of a distraction. Well, it _is_, but distractions have never made him bad at math.

He kind of always assumed if he married anyone it’d be Rhodey. Of course his parents had to go screw that up for him too. He met a man once, a couple years ago, who told him that he had everything and nothing and it’d been an offhand comment and Tony had been drunk at the time but it stuck with him even now. He’s never had to ask for anything, not if it was a material good anyway and he knows that makes him luckier than most. But anything that’s not material has always been difficult to find and not just because people tend to like to use him for him money. He gets that, really, and he has more than enough to give but he never did understand why people didn’t just _ask_.

Beyond that he’s always found it hard to connect with people and its not like he hasn’t tried. He likes people, being friendly, spending time with them but they don’t seem to like him back any. Maybe he’s got bad taste or maybe he’s just hard to love, he doesn’t know but he does know that people never seem to like him as much as he likes them. He supposes he can be happy that he and Bucky seem to dislike each other an equal amount. Well okay, he kind of hates Bucky and Bucky seems pretty indifferent to him specifically but he’s not happy about his jail sentence at all. Natasha tells him it’s not him that Bucky has a problem with but the system and he’s seen enough of them together to know she’s something of a Bucky expert.

Steve likes to think he’s an expert on Bucky too but Bucky shies away from him most of the time. Tony gets that because Steve is a self righteous cockwad and always has been. Steve doesn’t know Tony but Tony knows him, has met him a couple times before too but Steve clearly doesn’t remember him. He’d hold that against him except he’s not really that surprised by that and it had been years ago. But he _will_hold Steve’s shitty personality against him because he sucks. And he doesn’t seem to know Bucky as well as he thinks he does either, if he thinks they’re friends. Tony might not have a huge amount of experience in that department but he does know that friends don’t typically look like they’d rather be anywhere but around you.

Tony follows along with the math problems easily, not really needing the explanation from the teacher on how to do the work as he considers his options. Or rather his lack of them. He probably should have run off to another country, Rhodey probably would have abandoned his whole life to come with him too but he wouldn’t do that to Rhodey. And Howard has money, its not like he can just disappear without a trace without consequences. Otherwise he and his mom probably would have taken off years ago. He does have the skill set to manage disappearing without a trace, at least technologically, but that involves leaving behind all his accomplishments too. Maybe its stupid to stay stuck in a marriage he didn’t want for a couple of degrees but he worked hard on them. He doesn’t want to lose all that.

Which kind of leaves him stuck where he is though he could pull some crazy Gone Girl shit and fake his death, frame Bucky, and then live happily ever after but that seems like a lot of work and a lot of variables that could go wrong so maybe not.

So again, that leaves him stuck but at least he can still get another PhD he guesses. He’s on his way out of class reconsidering pulling some sort of Gone Girl like stunt when Pepper calls. He frowns at his phone for a moment, considering denying the video call before he decides to accept it. Pepper looks worried on the other end of the line but frowns when she looks around him. “You’re at school,” she says.

“Yeah, that’s where I am when I have class,” he says, deadpan.

“Well Rhodey made it sound like some kind of emergency so what the hell?” Tony lifts up his left hand and Pepper’s eyebrows fly up. “You two got _married_? Why the hell wasn’t I invited, you _know _I’d fly back for that,” she says and Tony lets out a long sigh.

“I didn’t marry Rhodey, he got deployed yesterday and apparently found time to call you. I got married to a guy named Bucky who’d committed some type of violent crime and I don’t really want the details,” he says.

Pepper stares at him for a long moment before hanging up. He shrugs and sticks his phone back in his pocket and heads towards the library. Might as well take up as much time as humanly possible before he gets stuck going back to a house he doesn’t want to live in.

His phone vibrates as he finds a quiet corner and he pulls it out to find a text from Pepper.

_I’ve got a flight out tonight. Be there in the morning_.

*

Natasha stares at the screen because she’s been reliably informed that movies are a good source of entertainment. So much so that people think television is somehow ruining society but frankly if _this _is what’s killing society it deserves to burn. Behind her the door opens and closes softly and she knows its Tony because Bucky had been brooding in his room all day before Steve came to drag him out of the house. “Movies… are garbage,” she says to him because she has to tell _someone_. It’s a bizarre instinct but the movie is _bad_.

Tony stops moving for a moment, presumably watching the screen. “That’s because that movie is shit. Why’d you choose that one?” he asks.

She shrugs, “it was on when I turned the TV on,” she says. She has no desire to choose another one after wasting her time on this garbage anyway. No wonder HYDRA and the Red Room both restricted her engagement in any kind of media. Maybe they had a point this one time in their methods besides torture of some kind.

“Yeah, well that’s what you get for watching the Hallmark channel. Give me a minute,” Tony says, making his way up the stairs presumably to his room. Natasha slumps in her seat because something tells her she’s about to be subjected to more movies and she can’t deny him if she wants him to become comfortable here with her and Bucky. And getting comfortable with her is an easy way to transition him into being more comfortable with Bucky. But she resents that she needs to waste more time to do it so Bucky best appreciate this.

When Tony reappears he’s carrying a small plastic case that he opens, fiddling with the TV for a moment before sticking the disk in what she presumes is some type of player not that she says anything out loud. She knows plenty about technology sure, its all necessary to know in this day and age, but she knows nothing of entertainment systems. That’s not relevant in the kinds of missions she had done, or really the kinds of missions _anyone_had done.

Tony picks himself back up and sits on the couch, giving a brief glance over his shoulder and Natasha sighs. “Bucky is gone, doing something with Steve,” she tells him. He whined about going too, but didn’t respond well when Natasha told him to just not go. She doesn’t understand his preoccupation with other people’s feelings. She doesn’t much care about others, save for Bucky and only when she wants to. Like now because his alternative is worse and she wasn’t kidding when she said she didn’t put in all the effort to drag him out of HYDRA for him to go to jail. So allowing Tony to get comfortable with them it is.

Her comment causes Tony to relax though, like she knew it would, and he turns back to the TV. “If you don’t like Star Wars I’m writing you off too,” he tells her.

She’s got no idea why he hasn’t written her off to begin with. Well, no she _does _know but she finds the baffling connection omegas seem to share amongst each other confusing. No one has earned trust by existing a certain way but they tend to flock towards each other for help. She knows this because she’s manipulated that trust more than a few times when she needed coverage in public spaces. So Tony has given her a level of trust already and that’s stupid of him but convenient for her. Even if she’s going to have to pretend to like whatever the hell Star Wars is. Once again, Bucky better appreciate her.

*

Natasha thinks she’s good at hiding her emotions but she’s not, he can tell she’s disinterested in the movie until Leia shows up, then she takes slightly more interest until she seems to decide that she doesn’t _dislike _the movie. “That was… alright,” Natasha says like it pains her to do so.

“Star Wars is a classic okay, if you don’t like it you have no taste and you should be sorry,” Tony tells her. Even _Rhodey _likes Star Wars and he’s a documentary only kind of guy not that Tony gets _why _that is. But he’s seen every shitty nature documentary David Attenborough has ever narrated so there’s that.

“Well, that was definitely better than the last movie I watched anyway,” she mumbles.

Tony squints at her, “the last movie you watched was When Harry Met Sally, _obviously _Star Wars was better.” That’s not even a contest honestly. Tony thinks the whole genre is shit and the omegas are always these weak waifs and the alphas are stupid, usually ignorant to their love interest, and have _nothing _to offer. And if it’s a fat ugly alpha dating a hot young omega it’s automatically into the trash pile because it’s _clearly _the drivel of an alpha who thinks they have more to offer than they do. The only thing worse than romance is horror, which basically kills omegas for daring to not act according to their stereotypes. God forbid they don’t like babysitting, have sex on purpose, or are more adventurous than most. Nope, automatic death sentence in any slasher movie.

Also, horror is scary and he doesn’t _like _scary movies. Sure its always Christian demons or whatever in the house and he doesn’t believe in any of that shit, but also _he _lives in a house and he doesn’t like that shit at _all_. People who like horror movies are freaks and they aren’t to be trusted.

“Oh, movies! Do you have Snow White?” a new voice asks and Tony nearly jumps out of his own skin. In his defense, and Tony is _not _prepared to give him one, Bucky looks like he feels bad about scaring him.

“No, Snow White is garbage,” he snaps.

Bucky shuffles awkwardly, looking at the ground. “I thought it was alright,” he murmurs.

Tony rolls his eyes and Natasha frowns, “what the hell is Snow White?”

He frowns because who the hell doesn’t know who _Snow White_is? “Disney princess?” Tony says, eyebrows drawing together in confusion. This doesn’t seem to clear up Natasha’s confusion, which really only confuses _him_more. “Do you live under a _rock_? Who doesn’t know who Snow White is?”

Natasha looks over to Bucky, who looks away and he _knows _there’s information to be had there but Natasha decides to ignore it. “Got any other movies like that one?” she asks and Tony grins.

“There’s a whole series, and novels, and comics, and the TV show, and-” Natasha cuts him off.

“I’m sorry I asked,” she says, getting up and making a hasty retreat.

*

Bucky knows there’s like a million things he needs to talk to Tony about and it didn’t take long for him to notice something was off about both him and Natasha. God damn Snow White. It’d been new in his time, but a Google search- so helpful- proved that there’s a whole _bunch _of Disney princesses now and Snow White is painfully out of date. And he’d been surprised to find that Natasha had watched a movie at all but he suspects Tony suggested the activity to begin with. Bucky, he remembers movies, but Natasha has no experience with the media type at all.

Sure, she’s seen stuff around on account of technology is everywhere, but she’s never experienced movies in a casual setting meant to entertain. Natasha doesn’t _do _entertainment, doesn’t even know how. Closest she comes is those little figurines she paints and Bucky knows she does it because it takes attention to detail and there’s not much she’s found that holds her focus like a mission had. Even if she did it’s not much comparable to what she used to do.

So he’d been surprised to find her watching a movie with Tony and he knows her, she didn’t hate it either. Didn’t seem to _like _it but she didn’t hate it. Tony seemed delighted by it, overly invested if anything so Bucky makes a note of it for later. Might be useful, trying to make him comfortable because he sure shit isn’t now and Bucky has no right to tell him whether or not he can continue with his degree but he thought it might make Tony feel better to know he wouldn’t conflict with his life. It didn’t, obviously, because Tony’s still clearly pissed off at life and Bucky can’t say he blames him for that.

But he still needs to talk to Tony about some things and this seems like as good a place as any so he goes to collect Tony, assuming he’ll leave his space willingly. He knocks softly on the door and waits a moment for Tony to either show up or ignore him. “What do you want?” comes after a brief moment and Bucky doesn’t know if Tony realizes its him or if he’s irritated with Natasha for not sharing his movie taste.

“Um,” Bucky says, words failing him for a moment. “Can I talk to you?” he asks.

He’s stuck waiting a long few moments before Tony speaks again. “Well are you going to talk or what?” he snaps eventually.

Bucky sighs. At least he isn’t afraid of him, not really. Or maybe he’s just like this when he’s afraid, Bucky supposes he doesn’t know but he _does _know Tony’s attitude would be a strange fear response.

“Uh. Would be easier to show you,” he says. He figures sight will explain a lot more than words ever could in this situation not that he expects Tony to open the door. He’s shown a pretty strong aversion to this whole thing and Bucky gets that. Its not like he wants to be here either but he’s the one that got them both into this mess. He figures it should be on him to make Tony feel comfortable however much neither of them want to be here. And Steve, god he’d looked so _relieved _to see him and maybe he didn’t appreciate the congratulations on the wedding he never wanted but it was nice to see Steve so relaxed. It’s been awhile since he’s looked like he slept at night.

The door opens, catching Bucky by surprise and pulling him from his thoughts. “What?” Tony asks, looking pissed off as ever. He kind of resembles the picture Bucky saw of him in that binder, glaring up at him.

For a moment he considers abandoning this all together because Tony needs time, he _knows _Tony needs time but he should also know what he’s walking into so Bucky takes a deep breath. “Uh… Come with me,” he says, stepping aside so Tony has plenty of space to step out of his room. He does, suspicious, but he does.

Bucky figures its now or never and leads him down the hall. He knows Tony isn’t stupid, he knows where Bucky’s room is. Probably knows where Natasha’s is too and he suspects if Natasha hadn’t already taken up residence in the basement he probably would have taken the space himself. It’s about as far away from Bucky as he can get.

But he doesn’t have that luck and Bucky didn’t have the luck of just getting a normal fucking sentence and none of this is ideal or even okay but it is what it is so Bucky leads Tony into his room. There really isn’t any further explanation needed and Tony, once again, doesn’t really _need _one because he puts things together fast. He looks around quickly, eyes categorizing everything as he goes and Bucky’s shocked he can do that so easily. It took Bucky a long time to master that skill and Natasha has always been better at it anyway.

Doesn’t really matter given that Tony makes an easy judgment. “If I wanted to get hit by an alpha I would have stuck with my father, thanks,” he snaps, giving a paddle close to his location a _look. _He turns on his heel and walks off before Bucky can say anything and that the hell is he supposed to say to that anyway? Of course Natasha conveniently left out _that _detail and he _knows _she knew.

He presses his fingers to his temples and sighs because what the hell is he going to do with Tony _now_?

*

Natasha looks at him like he’s stupid and Bucky resents that, really. “You _conveniently _left out his history of abuse, which would have been fucking _nice _to know about _before _I decided to show him my room,” he points out. Given that knowledge he probably would have handled introducing Tony to his stuff with a lot more tact. Its not like he has a desire to hit Tony the way he suspected, its just that he had an experimentation phase and kept most of the gear. He’s not really fond of most pain play, feels too close to what happened to him regardless of how negotiated it is.

“Your idiot ass never even should have started there,” Natasha tells him. “You can’t have expected him to react _well _to all this,” she says, gesturing around at his walls. Well sure he didn’t expect a _positive _reaction but he didn’t think he’d get _child abuse _thrown in his face about it either.

“I didn’t expect a positive reaction Nat, I just wanted him to be informed about what he was walking into. You know, all this,” he says, gesturing around like Nat had. Knowing what ‘this’ is might be helpful even if he was sure Tony wouldn’t have _any _kind of comfort level with him. Not that he has much with Tony either but he’s not stupid. Tony’s the one with more to lose here.

Natasha throws a loose leather cuff at his face and he smacks it away, unconcerned when it lands across the room. “You idiot, you don’t just jump in with this kind of thing. You need to establish rapport, find a way to make him feel comfortable with you,” she says, focused. The same way she would be if she needed to weasel information out of someone and Bucky doesn’t know how to explain that the real world isn’t a HYDRA mission. Manipulating people gets you what you want short term but that doesn’t work after awhile because people _notice _no matter how good you are.

But Natasha has no experience with that whatsoever and explaining that people aren’t information machines you can rig to get what you want isn’t something he’s been able to teach Natasha. Probably because she has no desire to make friends and she knows him well enough to have no real defenses around him now.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed but that’s not happening,” Bucky points out.

“Well, those videos of you worked on the jury. Would probably win you some points with Tony, plus it doubles for an explanation for you know. Why you’re _like _that,” she says flippantly, like people regularly use torture videos to gain sympathy points to achieve their ends in relationships.

Though in her defense that _is _what she’s been trained to do. “Natasha I’m not doing that.” He didn’t even want _Steve_to do that but Steve didn’t listen to him.

“Its an easy way to prove vulnerability. People like it when you seem vulnerable, makes them feel like they can be vulnerable too,” Natasha says.

An easy short cut sure but its manipulative and Bucky isn’t looking to manipulate Tony into feeling bad for him, he just wants Tony to know what’s going on here. But Natasha might have a point about him choosing a bad starting point. Probably should have started with the whole HYDRA thing and everything that came after but this felt smaller, easier to explain. Not that he got the chance to. With Tony’s history he can’t really blame him for acting that way either.

“Nat, I’m not going to manipulate Tony into caring about me,” he says finally.

Natasha looks confused not that he’d expect anything less. “Why not? I don’t think anything else will work,” she says.

“I want a relationship, not a transaction. You can’t manipulate people into a good relationship.” That’s not exactly a good foundation for anything real, which is what he says to Natasha when she looks confused.

Doesn’t seem to solve her lack of understanding though. “Bucky, its all chemical reactions in the brain. No relationship is real,” she says, shaking her head. She believes it too and why wouldn’t she? The only relationship she has was a forced bond that _was_a chemical reaction in the brain. And Natasha holds no connections to anything else, she was trained not to and since leaving she’s shown no interest in finding something new. Closest she’s come is watching a movie with Tony and Bucky _knows _that she was trying to lull him into some kind of sense of security so he’ll be comfortable enough to spend time with Bucky.

He knows this because that’s what she’s been trained to do, and because she genuinely cares about him however little she realizes that, she’s decided his goals are her goals too. It’s not something he knows how to break her out of. With his issues he doesn’t even have the _time _to do that either.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to work at the job I hate today so have an update so you don't need to feel as garbage as I do in the morning (or afternoon depending on the time zone) :) And also because is happens to follow the fake ass "schedule" I made to follow lol.
> 
> Warnings for mentions of child sexual abuse (NO actual children were or are abused in the actual story but mentions come up a couple times), non consensual drug use, and I guess suicidal ideation would be the best way to phrase it but casual references to suicide anyway.
> 
> This makes this chapter sound super dark and fucked up but I _promise_ you its only kind of fucked up.

Pepper has bangs and Tony decides he hates them. She looks like she’s twelve but he doesn’t tell her that because he’s pissed off and its not her fault. Might as well not take it out on her. She _does _look relieved to see him though and throws her arms around him as soon as she’s close enough. He hugs her tight, not aware of how much he needed that until it was happening. “You’ll be fine Tony, you always are. Kind of like a cockroach,” Pepper tells him and he laughs.

“I’m not like a cockroach!” he says, offended.

“Are too, I’ve watched you do _way_too many things that broke all kinds of safety codes only to live to think you’re not hard to kill off,” she says.

Well, in her defense she’s not exactly wrong about that. “So what are we doing today, hm?”

“_Something _with that hair. Honestly Tony, did you think getting married was a reason to let yourself go?” she asks, hands on her hips.

He bursts out laughing, shaking his head. “God Pep, I forgot how much you hated bedhead.”

“You have a brush. I know because I _bought _the brush. I suggest you use it,” Pepper tells him. “Your hair looks ridiculous.”

It doesn’t, he knows this because he’s not exactly ignorant to the way people look at him. Including Bucky even if he makes an obvious effort to hide it. Natasha less so, but fuck he’s never _met _someone so socially unaware of themselves and she seems to be confused by her attraction to him. Frankly she seems to be confused about most things but then she’ll whip out some weirdly in depth knowledge on a completely random subject. There’s a _whole _lot to that story he doesn’t know but he’s sure he’ll figure it out.

“I look adorable, deal with it,” Tony tells her, grinning at her over his shoulder as he walks off, Pepper close behind.

*

Pepper listens to Tony talk and he’s the smartest person she’s ever met but he’s also the dumbest. “Who is Natasha and why is she around?” she asks, baffled as to how she fits into this. And that whole thing with _Steve Rogers _that Tony just _glossed _over like it didn’t even happen. Pepper has no idea why he does this. He’ll be on about some random detail for _hours_if she lets him and then he’ll totally run by an important and useful detail in favor of the minor one he’s decided is more relevant. Like, apparently, random American legends _spontaneously _appearing in this entire arrangement for no real reason, or at least none that Tony gave.

“No idea,” Tony says, downing another glass of bourbon. Disgusting, she’s got no idea how he can stand the stuff but its Tony’s preferred drink.

“You have _no idea _why she’s around and it didn’t occur to you to question it?” she asks.

Tony shrugs, “honestly I was just glad someone else was there.”

Pepper stares at him for a moment, trying to figure out if he’s _that_dumb. He is, because of course he is. “What if they lock you in a box and hide you under the bed for several years, only taking you out to torture you? Who is this person and why are _you _not asking these questions yourself?” she asks. Tony is not this stupid; she _knows_he’s not this stupid so why is he acting like this?

Okay, no, he _is _just like that. Once he decided it was a good idea to take like five pills, no idea what they were, just for the fuck of it to see what happened. Rhodey lost his mind and it turned out they were all Advil but different colors so he was fine.

Tony squints, “that’s a weirdly specific set of terrible events Pep, what the fuck?”

“It happened once, look it up,” she tells him. “And ask who the hell these people _are_. Do you even know what this guy has been charged with? Because I feel like that is relevant information.”

Tony snorts, “Pep, I don’t even know his last name,” he says flippantly, waving down the bar tender to get another drink.

For a moment Pepper stares and out of shock or confusion she’s not entirely sure. “So you don’t know _your _last name,” she states, not asks. Only Tony.

“Abso_fucking_lutely not, I’m keeping my own last name, thanks. He’s probably got some stupid shit anyway,” he mumbles.

“Tony, ask some fucking questions to at least give _me_a piece of mind.” Rhodey too, but she doesn’t mention him. She suspects he’ll be sore about the subject and she _knows _Rhodey is. She’s not sure where he is, he didn’t feel the need to update her in between sending her a million ‘how to take care of Tony’ messages like she doesn’t already know how to. They’ve been friends for six years, she knows how to deal with him.

“What’s the worst that can happen?” Tony asks, already half drunk and Pepper needs to catch up to properly deal with this. She swallows the rest of her martini and resolves herself to ordering something stronger to keep up.

“Tony, I know you’re perhaps the most stupid smart person I know but I _know _you’re aware of the possibilities.” She doesn’t understand why he’s playing dumb here but Tony has strange stress reactions so for all she knows that’s what this is.

Tony happily takes his drink from the bar tender and downs that too and Pepper lets out a soft sigh. Getting him home is _not_going to be fun. “Pepper, I’m stuck in a marriage with a violent criminal that I had no say in. Does it really get _worse_? I mean yeah it could but I’m not stupid, I can just shoot myself,” he mumbles.

It’s not the first time he’s casually mentioned suicide as a solution to his problems but it is the first time she smacks him about it. “Tony Stark! _Enough_of that. You’re a damn genius and _that’s _the only solution you can come up with?” she asks.

For a moment Tony considers it, “well, I guess I could kill him and hope I get a pity sentence to a new marriage. Oh wait, no one thinks alphas can love violent omegas violence away,” he says bitterly.

Doesn’t work with betas either and frankly she’s tired of how much leniency alphas seem to get for their shitty behavior, provided they aren’t in other ‘undesirable’ groups. If they are they don’t get much pity either whether or not they committed the crime they’re accused of. Exceptions happen, but rarely.

She sighs. “Tony, you wouldn’t survive jail. You barely survived public college.”

Tony makes an offended noise, “I did fine!” Pepper gives him a _look _and he lets out a small huff. “Fine, there was an adjustment period but over all I was fine.”

He was not, its just that he and Rhodey went to the same school so Tony didn’t feel the stress as hard. Props to Rhodey for being able to put up with him, Pepper didn’t have the patience to put up with spoiled rich kid at the time. Of course now she has a better understanding of Tony though she still wouldn’t have been as polite as Rhodey about some things. Rhodey is too nice sometimes, letting Tony get away with being purposefully stupid because he’s had a hard life. Pepper doesn’t feel the same way he does- so he’s just as trapped by that privilege he has as he is freed by it, that’s no excuse to decide to hate Justin Hammer only because he stole his favorite AC/DC album. And because Tony doesn’t do things small hating the guy means all out war and she refuses to indulge him like Rhodey.

“Tony you cried over cafeteria food,” she says, giving him a _look_.

Tony shrugs, “okay, _everyone _should be crying over that. Poor people need standards,” he mumbles.

Pepper snorts, “poor people can’t afford to have them.” Not that she’d know, not really. She grew up upper middle class but she has friends who didn’t. They constantly seem to be running in circles, always thinking the next thing they do will get them out of whatever financial bind they’re in. Doesn’t seem to work most of the time. Rhodey has pretty much confirmed it, but he only spent a small portion of his life poor. His mom was lucky and married someone who happened to have a high paying job.

“If I were poor I would revolt,” Tony mumbles.

“If you were poor you’d do a lot of whining and crying but I doubt any of it would be revolutionary,” Pepper tells him. If Tony were poor he’d throw himself off a cliff. He wouldn’t survive if he couldn’t buy his favorite shampoo.

They remain silent for a long moment before Tony lets out a soft sigh. “This is the worst,” he mumbles.

“Could be worse,” she tells him, “you could be married to Justin Hammer.” And she’d have to listen to it even though it’s not nearly as bad as his current situation.

Tony considers this for a moment and the fact that he didn’t immediately react negatively is impressive. “Yeah, that’s true. At least Bucky is hot so he’s got that going for him.”

Pepper wrinkles her nose because _that’s_the guy’s name? “What kind of backwoods inbred kind of name is _that_?” she asks.

“_Right_?” Tony asks, throwing his hands up.

*

Pepper must feel the need to drink to deal with his problems and yeah him too. “Okay but like. Can you get a divorce?” she slurs, holding up a half finished martini.

Tony shrugs, “no fucking clue but I assume not. I’m the equivalent of a prison sentence, remember? Can’t divorce prison,” he points out.

Pepper downs the rest of her martini. “That’s a real confidence booster,” she mumbles. “I guess at least he’s hot,” she says.

Yeah, Tony will give him that not that he’s real comfortable about the whole thing on account of he like… probably killed people or worse. Given his uh _interests _Tony wouldn’t much be surprised by anything at this point.

“Shit consolation prize,” he mumbles as the bar tender drops off a drink he knows neither him nor Pepper ordered on account of its not what either of them have been drinking all night. He rolls his eyes because he can’t believe alphas, and he’s _sure_it was an alpha on account of betas and omegas usually pay attention to what people are drinking, can’t be assed to pay attention to what’s in his or Pepper’s hand.

He considers it for a moment before he figures fuck it, the hell else could go wrong? When he reaches for it though Pepper smacks his hand before he reaches it, “don’t be stupid, that could be drugged,” she says. She’s got damn paranoid living on the east coast though so he picks it up anyway.

“If I die I die,” he tells her, downing the whole thing and wrinkling his nose immediately. “Oh what the _fuck_was that sugary shit? People who drink that shit should be shot,” he says, coughing.

Pepper rolls her eyes, “you’re so dramatic. Like _your _taste in alcohols is much better, everything you like tastes like ass,” she says.

“Martinis are disgusting,” he says, laughing when she throws her olive at him.

“Maybe you could just disappear. You have the skills and you could like… sell your stuff or something. I’m sure it’s worth money,” she offers.

He sighs, “already thought of that. But I don’t really want to abandon all my accomplishments and I’m almost done my PhD too. This sucks but I also don’t want to make it suck worse. Plus I’d have to never talk to you or Rhodey again if I actually did that just in case someone found me through whatever way I contacted you guys so there’s also that.” He doesn’t want to leave either of them behind, but he’s not entirely sure he could let Rhodey go even if he genuinely wanted to disappear.

He’s known Rhodey for more of his life than he hasn’t at this point and Rhodey is one of the first people in his life to actually give him any kind of support. There was Jarvis of course, but there was only so much he could do in his position. Rhodey taught him that maybe he was worth more than the way he was treated and Tony believed him because unlike Jarvis he didn’t feel Rhodey had a vested interest in saying that given that he wasn’t paid to be around.

Then there’s his history with Pepper to be considered too, like the fact that she’s the only one he’s ever met who seems to see what he sees when he talks business. No one else sees the patterns that he does except Pepper. Plus they get along well; always have because they have a good understanding of each other even if she thinks he’s a dumbass most of the time. In her defense she’s not wrong.

“Your smart, I’m sure you could figure out a way around all that,” she says, having more faith in him than he does. That’s not really unusual, he supposes.

“Maybe, but there’s always the possibility that’ll go wrong,” he points out.

“Like things are going right right now?” she counters.

Yeah, she’s got a point there. “Well, its not really like getting the shit kicked out of me is _new_. It’s not exactly ideal, but it’s not new either.” So there’s more of the same, he figured he’d have to deal with that until he married Rhodey anyway but then Rhodey’s stupid ass didn’t tell him he was being deployed and Tony ended up married to someone else because he’s got either the best luck in the world or the worst. Rhodey once told him he’s never met anyone who seemed to cursed to either turn everything he touched into gold or dust, depending on the hour. Tony can’t say he’s met anyone with his luck either.

Pepper sighs, pressing her fingers to her temples. “Tony, you can’t just wait for abuse to happen,” she tells him.

He shrugs, “in Bucky’s defense he doesn’t seem that bad now minus the weird S&M shit.”

Pepper looks at him like he’s nuts. “The _what_?”

“Oh, did I forget to mention that? Oops. I’ll tell you about it later because right now I’m going to throw up,” he tells her in a too-cheerful tone.

*

Oh Pepper loves Tony but this is why she thinks he should still have a nanny despite being twenty one. Of course he drank too much and now he looks like death warmed over twice, plus he’s got a fever but _someone_has to get him home and no, she’s not at _all_comfortable with any of this Tony needs a bed and a bowl to throw up in ASAP. So this isn’t really ideal but its what she’s got at the moment.

Still though, she’s thrown when the redhead, Natasha presumably, answers the door because Pepper has never seen a woman so beautiful. “He looks like shit,” she says, nodding to Tony. “Smells awful too,” she adds, completely ruining her beauty.

“Yeah, had too much fun on a night out,” she mumbles. “So where is he sleeping?” Presumably not in Bucky’s room and she’s got _questions_about that not that Tony got a chance to answer before he was face first in the toilet at the bar they were at and Pepper really wishes she chose a less high maintenance friend.

Natasha considers Tony for a moment, about to respond when Bucky, Pepper assumes, appears. He sniffs the air and she immediately decides she hates him even if he gives Tony a concerned look. “I think he needs to go to the hospital. He’s going into heat but that doesn’t smell right,” he says.

Tony, for his part, wobbles a little and Pepper aims him at the bushes because she’s familiar with this by now. She feels a little bad for him at the moment but she also told him not to drink that damn drink and _no_, no one can tell Tony anything. “‘If I die I die?’” she repeats back to him, eyebrow raised. Bucky and Natasha look confused but she doesn’t give a shit about them.

And Tony, because he’s truly an asshole, turns to give Pepper an irritated glare. “Do I look fucking dead to you?” he asks, mustering energy out of nowhere because of course he does. Just to be a petty asshole.

“You look a bit undead,” Bucky says, choosing to chime in now. Pepper glares at him as Tony throws up again. Bucky gives him another concerned look and Pepper shuffles closer.

“I can handle this, thanks,” she says. Its not like it’s the first time, believe it or not, Tony has ingested something either knowingly or unknowingly that didn’t sit well with his system.

“You’re going to have to take Bucky, you’re not a family member so they won’t give you any information on his condition anyway,” Natasha says, stepping forward.

Bucky lets out a soft sigh, “Natasha,” he says, shaking his head slightly but Natasha looks unrepentant. Pepper knows some kind of communication has passed but she has no idea _what _it was. At the moment she’s not entirely inclined to care either because at least this time she doesn’t need to call Maria.

*

Alright, Tony will admit he doesn’t make good life choices but come on; its reasonable to expect the shitty sugary drink wouldn’t be drugged. This so isn’t his fault. Well, kind of it is but still. He feels like he had reasonable expectations that were failed. And now he feels like ass and he doesn’t know how long he’s been in the hospital but he _does _know he still has a fever that’s too high and he has no idea when Pepper’s inquisition began but he’s too tired to be awake enough to participate in it.

“Who even _are _you?” Pepper asks and Tony presumes the question is aimed at Natasha on account of they know who Bucky is.

“Natasha Romanov,” she responds and Tony knows Pepper won’t be pleased with that even if Natasha answers it mostly earnestly.

“Oh you know what I meant,” Pepper snaps.

“I don’t know how to answer that,” Natasha responds and Tony decides you know what, fuck that shit he has no interest in any of this so he’s going the _fuck _back to sleep.

When he wakes up again it’s obviously nighttime because the room is mostly dark save for a TV lighting up the space on the other side of the room. He looks over to find Pepper sitting in a chair beside him watching the TV and Bucky is, of all places, in the far corner of the room seemingly avoiding Pepper.

“That looks like shit,” Tony tells her, nodding at her hair.

Pepper turns to give him a dirty look. “Well if _someone _could just be a normal god damn person for a day I wouldn’t be driven to bad dye jobs!” she tells him, frazzled.

Tony wrinkles his nose, “don’t blame your shitty black dye job on me, you did this to you. I can tell because you didn’t get a few spots in the back.” He doesn’t anticipate her smacking him with a rolled up magazine but she does and he tries to wave her off. “Pepper!” he says, trying unsuccessfully to snatch her magazine.

“Maybe you should-” Bucky starts but Pepper points her magazine at him next.

“Don’t make me smack _you_with this,” she snaps. “By the way you married a fucking murderer,” she adds.

Tony slumps in relief, “oh thank _god_,” he says, at least happy _that_was the crime.

Pepper’s eyes all but bug out of her head and even Bucky looks confused. “Are you _insane_?” Pepper shrieks.

“No Pep, I just happen to know of all the heinous crimes the jury could have given him a pity sentence on murder is the most excusable.” Pepper smacks him with her magazine again and he tries unsuccessfully to wave her off. God, his whole body hurts and he’s got no clue how long he’s been here but shit if the doctors could like hurry up the damn treatment so he feels less like ass that’d be fucking _great_.

“How many of your damn brain cells died when you were drugged?” she asks.

He sighs because apparently this is what his life is now. He swears every time he dares to think maybe it won’t get worse something else shitty happens. “None Pep. Think about it- we excuse murder all the time. Its fine if you’re in the military because I guess killing for the state is fine, self defense is fine, within reason defending someone _else _is fine, you get the point. What excuse can you come up with to defend like… child molestation or rape or something? Nothing, so I’ll take murder maybe there was a real reason the jury felt bad that didn’t boil down to ‘pretty white alpha.’”

Bucky looks offended and he damn well shouldn’t because its not like Tony knew what he’d been charged with and its not like he was fucking forthcoming about it. “You thought I was a _child molester_?”

“Well I considered the possibility. Its not my fault you never said anything,” he points out.

“You didn’t ask!”

Tony rolls his eyes, “oh yeah, first thing anyone will say to someone who’s committed a violent crime should totally be ‘what crime did you commit’ like that doesn’t have a good chance of them landing in the hospital about it. Do _you _think I lost brain cells somewhere along the way?” he asks, squinting.

“I can’t believe murder _is _the most preferable option,” Pepper murmurs, slightly horrified.

“Well, if armed robbery counted for this sentence to be fair _that _would be the most preferable option but that was removed in 2001,” he says.

“Why does _molesting children _count?” Pepper asks, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

“Fuck if I know, those people are usually already married so its not like bonding will solve _that_problem but I’m not the idiot who made this an actual assed jail sentence. Speaking of, if any of you called the cops I’ll fucking slap you,” he says. He doubts it on account of why would a murderer call the cops and Pepper knows he has a strong distaste for them anyway but he figures its good to cover his bases.

Bucky frowns, “why?” he asks, apparently unconcerned about that time he was charged with murder Tony guesses.

“Because cops are fucking stupid and I don’t want the hassle.” God help those morons even if they _do _consider getting off their asses to actually try for once too. They seem to be completely incapable of actually doing their damn jobs even when they want to.

“Tony-” Bucky starts but Pepper cuts him off.

“You’re not going to win that battle, quit while you’re ahead,” she tells him.

“Uh huh. Quick question- anyone know if this per chance managed to completely ruin my system forever, ensuring I’ll never have to deal with a heat again?” he asks.

“No such luck,” Pepper tells him and he sighs.

“Do I at least like… have a morphine drip I can increase the dose on and go into a drug coma for awhile?” he asks.

Pepper gives him a _look_. “No, Tony.”

Well fuck him; life really just wants to fuck his ass today he guesses.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know its been eighty years since I've updated anything on here so sorry about that- I got into some other stuff, lost my access to Word, had to figure out pages since that's what I've got on my Mac (and I hate pages), and also just had a busy few months. I have no idea if updates will be regular, but I've got a bit of muse back for this story so hopefully I will get to updating it! And hopefully I will be able to post some other stuff on here too :)
> 
> Warnings for mentions of torture and animal death (non graphic).

Natasha squints at him, clearly trying to figure him out. “You… make no sense,” she murmurs.

Tony shrugs, used to that by now. “Awesome, I aim to confuse.”

“I feel like you should be more concerned about the fact that you were drugged,” she says.

“I feel like you should fuck off,” Tony tells her. Its not like it’s the first time he’s been handed something someone fucked with and he’s reminded as to why he doesn’t normally take things from other people outside of Pepper or Rhodey but whatever. Its not like his week could get worse though he’s sure whatever fucked up hell god is running his Sim will come up with some kind of thing before the week is out. You know, throw him in a pool and take out the ladder type fuckery. When bad luck hits it hits hard so he figures at least one more thing is bound to happen before maybe his luck will stop being so shit.

His phone buzzes and he pulls it from his pocket full well knowing that if he doesn’t answer Pepper promptly she’ll call until he answers.

_Ask what’s his face what his last name is. I forgot._

Right, probably thrown off by the whole murdered people thing and Tony can’t fucking believe that’s his good luck for the week. The fact that his husband could have been convicted of a more heinous crime then murder.

“I’m concerned with your lack of concern,” Natasha tells him, apparently unable to let it go.

“Good for you,” Tony mumbles, rolling his eyes. Across the kitchen Bucky looks confused about the whole interaction and Tony figures fuck it, might as well ask him questions now so Pepper stops pestering him.

“What’s your last name anyway?” he asks, throwing Natasha for a loop.

“Barnes,” Bucky tells him and Tony snorts.

“Wow, your parents must have hated you,” he mumbles, shaking his head.

Bucky frowns, “why?”

“Because they named you after Captain America’s best friend? My asshole father has done a lot of unforgivable shit but at least ‘Anthony’ isn’t the worst name he could have chosen.” He fucking hates Edward but whatever. Both are family names and he’s not passing on either of them.

Natasha and Bucky exchange a look. “You seem very stupid for a genius,” Natasha tells him and he flips her off because that’s fucking rude.

“I um. Am Bucky Barnes. The original one. Please tell me that people haven’t been naming their children after me,” he says, looking a bit horrified.

Tony considers this for a moment before he rolls his eyes. “You know I’m not a fucking idiot, right?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Debatable,” Natasha murmurs and Tony knocks her glass of juice over onto her lap for it. She looks at it for a moment before giving him one of the most confused looks he’s ever received from a person. Sometimes Tony wonders if Natasha even knows how to be a human she acts so weird. Its like she’s an alien trying out a piss poor role as a person.

“Tony, you have all the context clues you need to put this together. My lack of knowledge on popular media that inexplicably ends in the forties and Steve’s presence in my life probably being the two most obvious things,” Bucky says and Tony squints.

“You think that time you mentioned Snow White and Steve Rogers randomly being around means I’m somehow supposed to believe you didn’t die in the war and you inexplicably haven’t aged? Buddy.” He shakes his head because he might be dumb sometimes but he wasn’t born yesterday.

Bucky sighs. “Got injected with some form of the serum when I was in the war, Steve saved my ass, I ended up falling off a train, HYDRA found me, then there’s like seventy years of a lot of stuff I’d rather not relive, now I’m here. And for the record if I wanted to lie I wouldn’t have come up with such an absurd story,” he points out.

Tony snorts, “means nothing, had a full grown man try to convince me he was a five hundred year old demon once. Think he did one too many tabs of acid. Point is you’re going to have to give me better proof than your word for it,” Tony tells him.

Bucky turns to Natasha, who shrugs. “He doesn’t seem concerned that he got drugged by someone. I can’t help you convince stupid and reckless,” she says, still apparently hung up on that and truly baffled about it too. Whatever, that’s not Tony’s problem anyway. Bucky sighs, walking around the island in the kitchen before reaching for the rod holding up the most hideous kitchen curtains Tony has ever had the misfortune of witnessing. He bends the rod easily and hands it to Tony.

Obviously he tries to bend it back but that doesn’t do much. Tony squints at it like he can will it back into its normal shape or at least figure out its secrets but he has no such luck. Natasha looks at the bent rod for a moment before plodding off, returning a few moments later with the curtain rod from the living room, sans the curtain, and hands it to Bucky also. Bucky looks confused and Natasha looks confused about his confusion.

“What? If you want to preform a good experiment you need to repeat the results,” she points out. Bucky sighs and bends the rod, handing that one to Tony too.

One rod could be a trick, two is a bit much and yeah Natasha seems sketchy enough to pull off somehow having two bendy but not bendy to him rods lying around but that does feel like a bit of a stretch and Steve Rogers being around is suspect. Tony assumed it’d been because he’s Howard’s friend and this doesn’t make more sense at all. But there is an easy way to find out the truth so he shrugs, dropping the curtain rods onto the counter.

“Huh, what do you know. You’re Bucky Barnes,” he says, walking off to do a proper investigation now that he knows he’s not going to find anything more heinous than murder in his court files. Not serial either, because he’s sure Pepper would have made the distinction if there was one. So he can do murder and he can figure this out too, maybe see why he got that pity sentence to begin with.

*

Natasha feels unsettled and there’s no reason for her to be. Nothing has happened to her, she’s in no danger, and Bucky is basically indestructible even if he weren’t totally able to care for himself. So she doesn’t understand the disturbed feeling she’s got in the pit of her gut because there’s no reason for it to be there. She knows Bucky has noticed because he’s not stupid. She also knows that he’s probably more concerned about Tony, who seems to have bought Bucky’s story with too much ease. Natasha suspects Tony will try and verify it in some way and if he asks for her help she won’t deny it to him however much Bucky will want her to.

“That’s what happens when you care about people,” Bucky tells her and Natasha frowns.

“I don’t care about Tony,” she says but she knows that’s not really true. She didn’t like the feeling of seeing him pale in the hospital bed not that that look of vulnerability seemed to last. He’d still be in the hospital if not for the fact that he yelled enough to be released early so clearly he’s some kind of fine.

“Yes you do. He’s like that sick kitten you rescued once,” he tells her and she frowns.

“I drowned the sick kitten,” she points out.

“No, you were told to drown it and you did. That’s not the same thing,” he says.

She shrugs because she makes no distinction between the two. She’s never cared about anyone a day in her life except maybe Bucky, depending on the day, and she doesn’t care about Tony either. “So?”

Bucky sighs, “Natasha, you can pretend you’re heartless all you want but I know that’s not true. You were one of the few widows that didn’t lose their heart.”

Natasha rolls her eyes, “Bucky, I was the only one who lost it, that’s why the rest of them are dead.”

She stands to walk away but Bucky grabs her wrist. “Nat, you were the only one who hid it well enough for them not to notice, that’s not the same as not having a heart,” he points out.

She pulls her wrist from his grasp, remembering the look on Yelena’s face when she shot her point blank in the head. They’d been best friends for years though Yelena always confided more than Natasha, but she’d grown to comfortable in her alias’s skin so she had to go. Natasha had been sent to kill her and she did, no questions asked. Heartless people don’t do that kind of thing, but it _does_ remind her that she has a set of useful talents for the situation at hand and she’s never needed long to plan.

*

The court files are embarrassingly easy to find and Tony wonders if any of these morons think their systems are secure. Probably, despite the fact that a novice could have gotten into their systems but that’s not his problem. What he needs is evidence though he’s not entirely sure what he’s trying to prove.

At first the documents are boring and kind of trivial, just dumb cop paperwork and basic court stuff. Its not until he gets to _who_ got murdered that anything gets interesting because the first file he happens to pull, presumably the most important, is _JFK_. He raises an eyebrow as he reads over Bucky’s recount of the events, admittedly patchy, before moving on because the rest has _got_ to be fascinating.

Turns out it mostly isn’t, for the most part Bucky gives a list of names and events that always seem to be lacking an important detail or two and it doesn’t make sense to Tony until he finds the video. When he clicks on it he has no idea what it is, just that it was evidence entered in by the defense. He frowns at the image of Bucky strapped to some kind of chair clearly meant to ensure he can’t just leave it, people lingering about in the room in lab coats. Its creepy to say the least, and given the way Bucky’s chest is heaving he doesn’t want to be there either. If he squints he thinks he can make out a mouth guard and that doesn’t make-

He jumps when Bucky does, muscles tensing in his chair as he seems to almost buck out of it. He can’t escape thanks to the restraints and Tony is suddenly thankful for the lack of sound. Bucky’s body relaxes for a moment, chest heaving heavier than before, before he bucks back up, teeth clenching on what Tony has to assume is that mouth guard he thought he saw. Bucky relaxes again, head lulling to the side and Tony stops the video because he’s seen more than enough. He goes through the corresponding documents and finds that HYDRA had been using electroshock therapy on him and that’s surprising for a number of reasons but the main one is that he thought HYDRA died out with Nazi Germany.

So okay, there’s reason to think Bucky is telling the truth. Enough evidence that it seems the videos, because there’s more than one, of him being tortured managed to convince a jury to let him off with the lightest sentence they could and the guy killed _JFK_. Tony will give him credit where its due, he kept them all guessing on that one for years.

For a long moment he sits back, unsure what to do with the information. He considers leaving it, he’s got what he was looking for, but he’s never been one to leave well enough alone so he goes over the rest of the documents too, reading through them to get a sense of what the hell happened. As it turns out the events are as patchy as Bucky’s memory but a general timeline was created and corroborated by reports from various other agencies that essentially showed a long history of Bucky being an assassin. Which is _insane_. He’s married to an assassin who was tortured by Nazis and Natasha’s deal isn’t even _mentioned_ in all of this so what the fuck.

He sits there considering his options and he doesn’t even want to know _when_ the fuck Bucky found out about his weird fetish-y shit in between torture and trial mostly on account of he doesn’t want to think about it. But it _does_ give some type of context to who Bucky is and maybe he should deal with that. At least try and solve one of his many ongoing problems.

“I already hate this,” he mumbles as he pulls himself off his bed and walks around the room, stalling before dealing with Bucky. He doesn’t even know what to _say_. What the hell does someone say to an old ass man who also happens to be an assassin who committed one of the most famous assassinations in _history _and was also tortured by Nazis? That’s just a lot to deal with and he doesn’t even know where to start. He sighs, “whatever,” he mumbles and walks out of his room because when the hell does he plan anything?

He finds Bucky in the living room handing the rod back up and its still slightly bent so he hates that but he’ll worry about replacing it later. “Are you okay?” Bucky asks, looking back at him.

Tony frowns, “fine, why?”

“Well, you smell off for one,” Bucky tells him and _creepy_.

“Stop sniffing me,” he says and then crosses his arms over his chest because he doesn’t know what to say. Bucky seems to sense that so he leaves the rod alone and turns to face him. He looks him over for a few long moments before he scoffs and shakes his head.

“Natasha!” he calls out, walking past Tony and he frowns, taking off after Bucky. They don’t need to go far to find Natasha, who happens to be at the front door. “I _told_ you not to show him those videos!” Bucky snaps at her.

Tony winces, taking a step back out of habit more than anything but Natasha has literally no reaction, her face doesn’t move at _all_. “I didn’t, go yell at someone else,” she tells him, opening the door and walking out of it totally unbothered. Bucky seems frustrated with that and Tony’s on edge, unsure what to do and regretting leaving his room.

Bucky turns to face him and Tony takes another step back. “Where did you find the videos?” he asks.

“How the hell did you know I watched those? Well, one. Part of one,” he amends.

“I’m not an idiot, you looked exactly like the jury did. And its probably the only thing that would have made me seem more… I don’t know, human to you.”

“Then why would you tell Natasha not to show them to me? Not that I don’t appreciate that, thanks. I could have done without watching what I did.” He suspects he didn’t get the worst of it either and he’s more than fine with that.

“Because I wanted you to come to that conclusion on your own, not have some reason to feel sorry for me. Don’t, by the way, feel sorry for me. I don’t need that or want it. And I don’t want you to think I’m not some type of monster because you watched a video of me being tortured. Ideally you’d decide I’m not as awful as you think I am because I actually showed you I wasn’t,” Bucky says. “So go back to hiding in your room or whatever it is you want to do and let me actually earn your trust.”

Tony has no idea what to make of it, but it does solve his problem of not knowing what to say or do so he nods, walking away and heading back to his room to talk to Pepper because he’s sure she’s going to want to hear all of this. Her and Rhodey have both joked that his life is always a mess and a half but they don’t even know the half of it this time.

*

She’s forgotten how easy this is, figuring out who her target is, acquiring information and tracking them down. This one is shockingly easy to track from the video footage and clearly practiced given that he managed to get past both Pepper and Tony’s defenses, and for untrained civilians they aren’t bad at it. Well, they’re both pitiful at it but better than she’d expect given the circumstances.

It surprises her when he smiles at her and she frowns, head tilted to the side. “I don’t see why you’re so happy,” she says.

“Clearly you don’t own a mirror,” he says back, smiling wider.

She resists the urge to roll her eyes, suppressing her emotions easily as she pulls out a knife. “I own a mirror but I hardly think what I see in it is all that relevant,” she says truthfully. Useful, of course, because she’s beautiful and this isn’t the first time she’s had a target react to it, but ultimately meaningless because there’s nothing true in what she looks like. Its all a mirage to hide what’s underneath.

“Wait, what’s that?” he asks, noticing the knife too late.

“Nothing you need to worry about in five minutes,” she says though it won’t take that long for him to die.

“Wait, wait, wait, we can work something out here, you don’t need to-“

“You’ve seen my face moron, you’re going to die,” she tells him. “But I’ll make it quicker if you tell me who that accomplice of yours was.” He’d been easy to find, but his companion? Less so and she happens to know scared people talk fast and she’ll be sure to verify his information before killing him off. She learned from the time she got a bunch of false information she couldn’t correct given her informant was dead.

**Author's Note:**

> [My writing Tumblr](https://tenspencerriedplease.tumblr.com/)


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